Death of a Zombie

The Walking Dead's first season just ended, and while I didn't love the human characters in it, it's pretty cool to have zombies in your living room. As I was watching the survivors trying to stay alive in the zombie apocalypse, I thought about how poorly I would handle this catastrophic event.  This is because...

1) I've never shot a gun, but if my experience in multi-player shooting games is any indication (always last place, always), I would not be a good shot, so I'd probably end up being eaten alive by a zombie even with a gun in my hand.

2) I'm not like fat people where I am constantly thinking about food, in fact I usually forget to eat, but when I do eat I like to know I can keep eating until I'm full. Hence, I would not do well on the can-of-beans-a-day diet.

3) Society never recovers from a zombie attack. So that hopelessness would not help my emotional state, likely resulting in a breakdown where I'd question the purpose of my existence and try to bring others down with me.

4) I have a very strange taste in women and could see myself falling in love with an emo zombie girl and then trying to write a terrible song about our forbidden romance before she fatefully bit me.