♫

I've been digging this song lately and not just because I have a debilitating weakness for female singers.

'Til Sweat Drop Down My...

I have a sweating problem.  Nothing has been able to cure it - I've trimmed my armpit hair, used anti-perspirant (ha!), even avoided talking to girls.

But none of these worked.  It's because my sweating is related to anxiety.  But it's not my anxiety.  I sweat for other people.  Let me explain.

The symbol of the awk

As someone who was nicknamed "Awk" in high school and had a hand gesture to accompany it (see right), I am fully aware of awkwardness in all its aspects.  Today, I believe I have mostly outgrown the "awk" in me, but the experience still dwells within me. As such, I feel deep, deep empathy for "awks" today because I see myself in them.  As a result, I become anxious for them as they stumble through society and end up sweating myself. So other people's social anxiety becomes my social anxiety.

An example to illustrate this: we are presenting our research in my writing class, and this kid today was killing me - "um" after every sentence, shifting back and forth, rapid arm movements, looking down at notes.  It was painful, not to mention he went over the time limit yet was completely unaware of this and still had multiple slides left.  I was dying inside for this poor soul and suffering outside in the form of another wet shirt.

It's just not limited to fellow "awks" though, I sweat in anticipation of or during any potentially awkward situation.  If a professor asks a question and no one is answering, I feel awkward for that professor and might raise my hand to rescue him/her, but in the process actually don't know what I'm going to talk about so I stumble over my words and end up sweating even more.

This is why I wear dark clothing.    

What Really Grinds My Gears: Issue #3

At the sporting events I've been attending recently there has been a common thread - girls being embarrassed to be seen on camera.  

I don't understand this phenomenon at all.  In between breaks in action, the big screen will begin showing various people in the crowd and then a girl will be shown who then proceeds to act like she's been caught just waking up in the morning without any makeup and a nose full of boogers.  Except she's not.  She's usually not ugly either.  She's a normal looking girl who clearly is confident enough to leave her place of dwelling and be seen by the thousands of people she passes/encounters on the way to the sporting event.  Yet once a camera is on her, it's like she's watching a horror movie - hands are brought up to the face, and are briefly lowered before realizing they are still on the screen and they go back to shielding the world from...what?  I just don't understand this.  What is so embarrassing about being shown?  Are girls that insecure?  I thought I had issues.  

Car Troubles

My car currently smells like Ke$Ha after she wakes up in the mornin' feelin' like P Diddy.  I have three theories:

1) A piece of the Spicy Chicken Fillet I ate from Wendy's Drive-Thru dropped into the cracks of my seat and is currently decomposing.  In hindsight, I should only eat McDonald's in my car since their stuff doesn't decompose... (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/10/13/mcdonalds-happy-meal-photos-6-months_n_761364.html)

2) My dog's tight halloween costume (all her fat comments - got another one today - irked me and I wanted to prove all the haters wrong by getting her the small instead of the medium) squeezed something out of her in the backseat that I have not been able to locate (but can certainly smell).

3) I laid the greatest fart in the history of the world.

I'll get to the bottom of this.