There are times when I wish my dog could talk. Things she might say:
"Nick, I'm not pawing at your chair while you're eating breakfast for nothing. I haven't defecated for more than 2 days and now it's hit me like a steam train. Still ignoring me? All right then. When you go take a shower, I'm going to lay the biggest deuce I've ever laid in your three years of knowing me. And just to teach you a lesson, I'm going to barf on your bathroom rug."
"Your facial expressions when you're dancing alone in the apartment suggest you think you're a good dancer. You're not."
"I'm helping you meet females from your building, the least you could do is toss me a slice of that ham you're putting on that ham sandwich."
"(sigh) IAMS again. Remind me why I wake up every morning?"
"I love you."
I would like to know she's thinking - I want to know if she's sick of something, wants to go outside more, or whatever...maybe if she had a blog.
I would feel bad, however, if she could speak because then she could understand the lady who asked if she was pregnant last week. Thankfully, she wouldn't know Spanish, so she couldn't have understood the other lady who called her "gordito".
Oh, the joys of a dog. I think you love your dog more than I do because I don't care what Rosie is thinking. Hope it going well. Had lunch with your cute Mom today, did I mention she is one of my most favorite people in the world to be around. Someday you will feel the same if not already.
ReplyDeleteAs for popping zits, you know you are a true picker if your mouth waters when you get a real juicy one. Tony thinks I am wack because I am bummed that he doesn't have zits for me to pop.